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| If you press the red button, you will get your heat, but a person will die somewhere in the world. |
I speak for myself, but I project that every Chicagoan must have a love/hate relationship with the Easy Button. I love that I can stand under the toasty lamps with my pigeon colony friends and have a buffer from the frigid wind. Especially valuable given that my office El stop is perhaps THE COLDEST PLACE IN THE WORLD. That's saying a lot considering I spent four years in Siberacuse.
But I hate that I have to use it at all. Its reemergence each fall means that deepest winter is around the corner and pretty soon I will be pushing that button like a cocaine-addicted mouse in a lab experiment.
The first rule of Easy Button (and the only one) is that if you are standing nearest the button, your sole role in life while on that platform is to reset the heater the split second the timer kicks off. Preferably a second before it turns off. Count in your head if you have to. Yesterday, I stumbled into the button keeper job and let a whole two seconds pass after the lamps turned off before several people's heads whipped around at me, as if to say, "W.T.F.? Do your JOB, woman!" My reflexes will improve. By February I will be an Easy Button Ninja.
I love everything about this post!
ReplyDeleteI am also loving your "The Box" reference with your caption, just saw that the other day and my final reaction was WTF.
Haha - I love the box reference as well. I am also imagining that there are tiny dragons enslaved under the platform, who get a firm poke in the belly every time you hit the button. Perhaps someday they will break free of their sub-EL prison and gently warm everyone to death.
ReplyDeleteDragons would probably be a fun addition to the CTA. I bet people would shut up on their cells and focus if they knew a tiny fire-breather was somewhere in the station.
ReplyDelete